Thanksgiving Dinner

We celebrated Thanksgiving dinner on Saturday evening instead of the traditional Thursday since it isn't a holiday here in China. Our guests were friends from the Portman (our residence for the first two years) Dorsey and Joel and their two girls Lily and JoJo and new friends Christi and Tom (new to China) and their two girls Sophie and Janie. Morgan, JoJo, and Janie are all about the same age, within a few weeks, as are Lily and Sophie, so it was all set to be a great time for the kids. Unfortunately, with Morgan having bronchitis, we had to banish her to the 2nd floor with her ayi, Cathy, as soon as guests arrived. So, instead of having fun with the other kids, Morgan watched Dora and Barney in mommy's room all night. :-( However, with ayi Runa to watch the other kids so moms and dads could eat and socialize, I still think everyone had fun.

We ordered our 16 lb. turkey from Bubba's, owned by a Texan, which specializes in slow roasted pulled pork and ribs. This year he offered to do smoked turkeys for 700 RMB (roughly $100) - and hands down, it was the best $100 we've spent in a while. The turkey was absolutely fantastic - delicious, juicy inside with a spicy, crusty skin. Actually, it was probably too spicy for me - I got a small bite on accident and had to down a glass of water to ease my suffering mouth. We had mashed potatoes, roasted garlic green beans, and the stove top stuffing wasn't too bad! Unfortunately, our attempt at instant gravy was a bust, but it was pretty much the only casualty of the night. Dorsey contributed sweet potatoe casserole that had the best topping - I must have that recipe - and homemade pumpkin pie - YUM! Christi brought a salad, brownies (yum- a new must have for Thanksgiving - well, anytime, really), and a delicious apple pie from our favorite French bakery in town, Pauls. We had lots of wine and too much food - can a Thanksgiving really get better than that?

Thanks Christi and Dorsey for helping to make our Thanksgiving feel like home!

Morgan's Hospital Visit

As I said in one of my earlier posts, Morgan had been sick all week. Twice I made and subsequently cancelled a visit to her pediatrician. Morgan would have a rough night and/or morning but would seem to be better in the morning. But, after three days of a fever over 100 degrees, I thought it was time to go in. Unfortunately, there were no pediatric appointments on Saturday and the family doctors were booked, too. We also checked another western facility nearby, but they needed a passport since we hadn't visited before and ours were at Bob's office so they could be turned in to the local police station for the mandated updating of residence visas. With the impending visit that night of four of our friends and their four children, we needed to get Morgan looked at. So, off to the ER!

This was nowhere near our first visit to the ER in Shanghai - with accident prone Melissa and a small child, we've had our fair share of emergency runs. Oh yes, let's not forget the time two months after we first arrived when Bob thought he would be funny with Melissa's exercise equipment and snapped a trainer bungee into his eye! Getting back to topic. . . I had high expectations of a good visit to the ER and was not disappointed. We were ushered immediately into one of the fever triage rooms (one of two), separated from the rest of the small ER. A nurse immediately took Morgan's temp and said "Oh my - take her clothes off!" Apparently, it was 39.7 degrees, about 103.5 F. Plus, this was 30 minutes after her last Motrin dose - so the nurse gave her some more and we waited for her temp to come down. Five minutes later, in walked the doctor, a local who could speak English and a tech from the lab to take blood. After her blood draw, during which, of course, Morgan screamed the entire time, the doc listened to Morgan's chest while she freaked out some more, screaming "Mama, Mama!" the whole time - I'm surprised he could hear anything over her uproar! He thought it was bronchitis but wanted to wait for the blood test. Within ten minutes, we had the results - a bacterial infection - so antibiotics and cough medicine were prescribed. We would have been on our way, but with Morgan's high fever, they wanted me to keep her around until it came down. In came the nurse - 39.0 (102.2) with a lecture about making sure Morgan was well hydrated. That's usually the only problem I have with the hospital - the nurses always project this attitude of condescension, an "I know better than you" so you should listen to me demeanor. Now, I appreciate nurses - in my family both sisters are nurses, my mom is a nurse, my brother and stepbrother and both of their wives are nurses. Believe me, if I didn't appreciate nurses, I'd certainly hear about it from someone. However, I always feel the Chinese nurses take it one (or five) step/s too far in telling you how to take care of your child. We had the same problem when we were in the hospital for Morgan's birth, but I digress, so I've made Bob promise he would post those blogs. Anyway, I KNOW that if Morgan has a fever, she should be hydrated. Every 10 or 15 minutes I offer her something - anything - to drink or eat. But, come on, she's a toddler - she likes asserting her own independence. If she continues to say no, then I'm not forcing her as long as she takes something occasionally.

15 minutes later the nurse took Morgan's temp again and it was finally down to 38.7 (101.6) so we were allowed to leave. All in all, the whole trip including drive time took about an hour and half. If we were in the US, we'd probably still be in the waiting room after that time! I guess if you've gotta get sick, the western hospitals in Shanghai aren't necessarily a bad place to be.

Hodgepodge

Since it's the holiday back home, Bob decided to take a 1/2 day yesterday off work (to golf, of course) and all of today. Morgan has been sick and getting up often at night, so it was nice to roll over at 7:00 am and say, "Your turn!" while I caught a few more zzzs. Later Bob headed out to shop for our Thanksgiving dinner tomorrow at City Shop, the store that sells overpriced imported foods, and Metro - the Chinese version of Costco.

A few hours later, it was time for me to head to my moms' day out. Nicole, Morgan's teacher and my friend, was hosting an event at the school for moms. For 200 RMB (roughly $30), there was free flow wine (ahhhh) and appetizers and you had a choice of two of the following, each 1/2 hour in length: head/shoulder massage, foot massage, mini-manicure, or mini-pedicure - I chose the two massages. I have to admit, the shoulder massage was a bit rough, although I certainly could have told her to soften up. I just kept thinking to myself that I needed to get all those knots worked out of my shoulders and neck. But, the head massage was heavenly! I've had a headache for several days now that Tylenol doesn't seem to touch - partly from my own mild illness, partly from dealing with a crying, whiny child who constantly says momma, momma ALL DAY LONG. The foot massage was nice, too, but I was catching up with a friend I hadn't seen in months (a fellow Michigander) and didn't really focus on relaxing. All in all, though, it was a good hour. As I was getting my head massaged, I kept thinking to myself, these are the things I am going to miss when I go back home. Nowhere will I be able to find a 1 hour oil massage for $30, the price at Dragonfly Retreat, where Bob and I frequent. If you want just a standard massage, no oil, it's even less. Body massage, foot massage - both about $25. Basic facial - about $30. If you go to more local places, you can pay significantly less than even these prices! Yes, there are many things I don't like about China, but you can't beat the cost of their massage services.

Along with the massages and food, Nicole also had some expat vendors come in to sell their wares, and she also auctioned off several pieces of furniture donated from a local antique store. Because things are often difficult to find here, many people (wives or moms, especially) start their own businesses, and I try to frequent them whenever possible - not only because I like to support other moms in their quest to do something for themselves, but also because it's nice to have some items that remind me of home. Today, I was thinking about x-mas shopping, so I picked up a few books for Morgan, two of them about Santa, and some jewelry for myself and my nieces (since we're going to be here in Shanghai on x-mas day, I had to make sure there were presents under the tree for me, too!). We also bid and subsequently won two of the auction pieces. One of the pieces is a vase from the Shaanxi province made out of paper. It's pretty cool because on the inside you can see remnants of Chinese newspapers. Another larger piece I wasn't sure about bidding on, so I called Bob up to come see it. When he got there, his first question was "Do we need it?" Nancy, one of Morgan's teachers, heard Bob and said, "Men - you're all the same!" This is very reminiscent of a time at Costco when Bob brought me over to look at a dollie, you know, one of those things you see at Home Depot where the guys with back supports (and big bellies) are lifting things. My first question was "Do we need that?" and a guy standing nearby said to me, "Is it really a question of need?" I guess what this tells me is that it's not a question of what YOU think is needed but what makes your spouse happy. [I'm not even going to mention the time Bob went to Costco and came home with a 4x8 utility trailer!

Afterward, Bob and I headed to the Hongqiao Flower Market, where you can get just about any kind of flower arrangement, plant, etc you can imagine. I, however, had seen on a previous visit x-mas trees! Since this is the first year we'll be actually in town for x-mas day and Morgan is (almost) old enough to appreciate it, I wanted a tree. I didn't actually want a live tree, although you can certainly find them here (mostly still potted) because of all the logistical problems of what to do with it after the holiday. There is no curbside pick up of x-mas trees in Shanghai! And, I didn't want something big, either. It's really just a token tree. Bob says that it's a little like the Chinese economy - on the surface, it looks ok, but it's a little wobbly! At home, we do the whole tree farm deal and we love it. Bob was able to put the Expedition in four wheel drive for one time every year, so it made the whole experience (and expense) worthwhile for him. Tonight we put the tree up. When I said that I hated the "shaping" of artificial trees, Bob said, "What do you mean? What shaping?" Apparently, having an artifical tree (and actually putting it up himself) was a first for Bob. Speaking of which, we should go turn off our lights downstairs. Each strand was only 10 RMB ($1.47) each and the terminals were REALLY thin, so I'm thinking we have an honest to goodness fire hazard on our hands.

Sick Household

I'd love to add another mildly amusing tale of life in Shanghai, but frankly, I'm just too tired today. Morgan is sick yet again with a phlegmy cough, moderate fever, and general grumps. To top it off, I now have the cough and a mild fever and simply feel crappy. But, since moms generally can't allow themselves time to be sick (especially stay at home moms, like myself), mine gets shoved to the backburner while I take care of Morgan.

I thought we were doing really well this morning because Morgan wanted to eat. I gave her a pedialyte freezy pop first and she ate about half. Then, an hour later she wanted cereal. I though, "Great, she's feeling better: asking for food and playing a little." Unfortunately, I tempted fate a little too much. Lulled into a false security of general improvement, I got us dressed for the cold and decided to take a walk. Not far away from our compound, Morgan started crying and wanted to be held, so I picked her up while she proceeded to cough and hack for a few moments. Then, as you might have guessed, up came the cereal - all over Morgan, me, and yes, the sidewalk. So, the next time I think about complaining about the smells of Shanghai, I'll gently remind myself that my hands aren't exactly clean.

Smells of Shanghai

When I wrote yesterday that the next post could be Sucky in Shanghai, I probably didn't take into account how long a post like that might become. Let's just say I could have another entire blog devoted entirely to that topic. So, I thought I would narrow it down for today.



Before I took Morgan to school today, I looked outside and saw a light fog. No, fog wouldn't be quite the right word - maybe "haze" would be more appropriate. I had fleeting thoughts of whether the conditions were ripe for fog because it really hasn't gotten cold here yet. (It has gotten chilly with temperatures ranging somewhere in the 50s lately.) By the time I got to the street with Morgan in the stroller, the truth had hit: fog really was inappropriate because fog indicates a natural element dependent upon weather conditions. What I saw was chemically related. It really only took one breath before I could smell the not-so-faint undertones of exhaust in the air. My second breath left me with a slightly tangy toxic aftertaste on the back of my tongue, a truly appetizing breakfast. It's not surprising, really. With approximately 20 million people in Shanghai, there are a lot of cars on the road here. Admittedly, most people do not own cars, like they do in the US or other developed cities/countries in the world. But, they are fast trying to catch up. Luckily, the government does limit how many people are allowed to own a license plate in the city at any given time. Plus, the exorbitant cost of such plate prohibits most people from attempting it. However, it does seem like there are literally a million cars on the roads in Shanghai. Is that figure accurate? Who knows. . . The answer would probably be easy to find if I read or spoke any Chinese. However, my few brief lessons in brushstrokes taken over two years ago has failed to help me decifer the elusive Chinese character. It still looks like scribble to me. I could ask my driver, Bobby, for the answer to my question but even with his fairly good English, I'm not sure he would understand my request or have the means to find the answer. But, since most of you living at home (except for my Shanghai friends) would have no concept of what Shanghai traffic looks like, you'll have to accept my best estimation.



As soon as I grew accustomed to the sweet scent of tailpipe, I passed a man on the street holding his hand up to his nose. This isn't exactly uncommon for westerners who are routinely surprised by the unpleasantness of city smells, but this guy was a local Chinese. Ok, was he really local? Who knows as he was rather well dressed - I didn't exactly flag him down for a chat. Maybe he was an ABC (American Born Chinese, for those of you not in the know) or of another Asian descent. I guess I just assumed so because I live in a local locale (how's that for some alliteration?) Regardless, he had alerted me that some unpleasant odor would soon be upon me. Sure enough, several steps later I was greeted by what I believed to be the scent of excrement - yes, poop. As a mom to a toddler, you'd think that I would be relatively immune to a wiff of the doody, but smelling your own child's stuff is rather different than some complete stranger. I hope you have noticed that I have assumed this previously mentioned streetside excrement was human. Could it be an animal? Most certainly. Could it be human? Just as likely. You see, the streets are littered, literally, with repulsive paraphernalia. Trash cans, although in existence, just aren't used that often. Litter, spittle, hawkers, urine, and yes, poop, are always on the sidewalk. I know many of you haven't seen it, but young kids here don't wear diapers - they have split pants. Yes, that's right - a split right in the pants where the privates are. I guess it speeds things up for parents. Instead of pulling down a kid's pants and taking them to a toilet, they just hold them in a squat position over the sidewalk. Older kids just squat down on their own. I kid you not. This is a picture of a little girl doing it in Tiananmen Square. Needless to say, you ALWAYS look down when you walk and take care to avoid any puddles, especially if it hasn't rained lately.



Bob and I have talked often about wanting to bottle the smells of Shanghai. Well, Bob talks about it in one of his "Hey, I've got a way to make money" kind of schemes. Really, though, unless it's a white elephant type gift, who would want to open a bottle of that? What would you name it - Super Pooper? Come on, humor me - tell me your best name. If you have the winningest entry, I'll even send you a free bottle.

Desperate to be Thankful

Since it's Thanksgiving week, I thought it might be appropriate to finally start this blog with things that I am truly thankful for. There's only one problem - well, several problems encompassed under one umbrella - I'm hating China right now. I know it seems a familiar theme to those of you who've listened to my various diatribes on how much I hate life in Asia. In truth, I don't always hate living here. There are many days that I find tolerable - enjoyable even! In that spirit, I am going to try to close my eyes (metaphorically, of course, so that I can still type without mistakes) and imagine myself in happier times. Perhaps my next entry I can fill you with all things "Sucky in Shanghai." Today, let's be thankful:

Morgan at school and with Miss Nancy

Morgan is enjoying her school. We have finally reached a point again where Morgan happily goes off to play with her friends and teachers while I casually slip out the door. This may seem like no mean feat to those of you without a toddler, but trust me - trying to convince a 20 month old that she needs to spend some time away from mommy can be one of my larger challenges during the day. One of my favorite moments yesterday was when Morgan clearly said "Hello" (ok, sounds more like hewwo) to Miss Nicole. What a lifesaver, that Nicole (and her assistant Miss Nancy). Unfazed my Morgan's screaming and crying for the past two months when I've dropped her off to play, Nicole is finally reaping the rewards of her hard work! Perhaps it's because Morgan is finally sleeping through the night again (another thing to be thankful for). Perhaps she's just getting older or her teeth are finally popping the surface of her gums so she's not in constant pain. Whatever the reason my lovely daughter finally loves her school, I am forever thankful!

One other major thing I should say is that I am extremely thankful for my many wonderful friends. I am sad that many of my Shanghai friends have left the city and are happily ensconced in their homes in the US. As expat life goes, new friends are always being made, but I still relish time spent with some of the "old timers" and "long termers." Others have made their way to various cities in the world - Singapore, Sydney, and a lucky few in Europe. And I do dearly miss my pre-expat friends from home - both Ohio and Michigan. Expat life would be hard without good friends both here and at home, so I thank all of you for the many happy memories we have created together!

A few of my new expat friends are coming over this Saturday for our first Leney family attempt at Thanksgiving. It isn't a holiday here, so everyone needs to work Thursday and Friday. Most people we know are having celebrations over the weekend. It would be much harder to host a dinner if we weren't fortunate to have many places in the city that deliver US (pre-cooked) turkeys. Asian ovens aren't usually meant for the large sized turkeys we usually consume during the holidays. This year Bob and I have ordered a smoked turkey from a local bar, Bubba's, that a transplanted Texan owns. We are looking forward to seeing how it tastes. Otherwise, we are being pretty traditional - mashed potatoes, hopefully gravy, Stove top stuffing, and Bob's special garlic roasted green beans will grace our table. (Don't turn up your nose at the Stove Top - authentic ingredients are often hard to come by in Shanghai and we pay dearly for these boxed alternative options!) If I am ambitious, I'll also be making a sweet potato casserole - sweet potatoes are always in abundance this time of year and you can always find roasted ones being cooked on street carts by locals.

I hope you all enjoy your Thanksgiving holidays!